Why I don't cook

My mom has always joked that I need to find myself a housewife.  That may be true in the states when I'm busy working, but I'd like to think I can be my own housewife here in Nicaragua.  Except that here, I have a maid who cleans and does my laundry every week for about $5.  And I still can't cook.


My friends here are big on group cooking events, so I have gotten very good at cutting vegetables for the grill.  Skills include red peppers, green peppers, onions and zucchini.  O, and I'm an expert at cutting pineapple and papaya now.  Applying these skills to my own mini-kitchen, I've gotten hooked on the gigantic carrots they have at the grocery store (I honestly do not know how they get them that big!)  Cooked carrots have become a nearly daily dinner occurence now. 

Ridiculously large carrots that I love next to eggs (which are normal sized here) and my finger for comparison.  And yes, I'm the weirdo that not only loves carrots but takes pictures of them for a blog.  You are welcome.

But let's get to the real story of this post: There's this certain Nica food called "salpicon" which may be one of the best things I've ever eaten.  It's basically boiled beef with lots of salt, lime and onion, according to what they bring for my $1.50 lunch.  They only have salpicon one day a week and you never know exactly what day.  So it's always exciting.

Anyways, I figured I'd try to make it.  Afterall, I was getting so good at cutting vegetables, salpicon seemed like a natural next step.  Keep in mind, I'm the girl that generally stick to sandwiches and breakfast foods (yogurt, eggs, cereal, etc) for most meals because they are 1) delicious and 2) easy.  The simpler the meal, the better.

First a disclaimer: it's not as easy to cook here as you would think.  My stove and oven do not have temperatures.  Just max & min.  I've now made and burnt 2 pans of brownies and let me tell you, it takes 2-4 soak/scrubs to get crisp brownies off a glass pan.

So why I thought it was a good idea to make salpicon I do not know.  But it went like this...

- Went to the grocery store and walked up to the meat counter.  I told the lady I wanted to make salpicon and that I didn't know what type of meat I needed.  She told me so I asked for 1/2 a pound.  She looked at me like I was crazy.  I said "is that a lot?" No, apparently that is very little, so I walked away with 1 pound of bloody meat (gross!).

- Came home and looked up a recipe for salpicon.  Turns out, I can't find the Nicaragua version anywhere and I don't have the ingredients for the other versions because I have a mini-kitchen, I'm leaving in a month or so and oh, yeah, I don't cook.  Just gonna wing it.

- Read a recipe online.  The meat has to boil for 1.5-2 hours.  It takes twice as long to cook this stupid piece of bloody meat as it does to cook (or burn) brownies.  And it's not even chocolate.  I decide to freeze the meat.

- A week later I decide it's time to man-up, or woman-up in this case, and cook the darn thing.  2 hours later, it's still not tender.  Time for google...

http://www.google.com/search?q=boiled+meat+not+getting+tender&sourceid=ie7&rls=com.microsoft:es-NI:IE-SearchBox&ie=&oe=

Apparently you shouldn't have it on a high temperature to begin with, even though the recipe said boil, so I put it on the max setting.  Oops.  But did I seriously think I was actually going to get it right? That would be the day.

- The Bachelor is on and I don't feel like working out quite yet, so I decide to hand-shred this non-tender meat.  Being a perfectionist, it takes forever.

- Add the lime and salt, taste it.  Not the best, but pretty close.  Except now I'm so sick of the smell of onions on my hands and 2 hours of smelling this boiling beef that I've lost my appetite.  Into the fridge it goes.

So I made salpicon, or something that I call salpicon.  And I probably will never make it again.  And I'm going to enjoy my $1.50 salpicon for lunch this week that much more.

Sandwich anyone? 

O Nicaragua...

I think when you truly love someone, their little idiosyncrasies that make them who they are drive you nuts and also make you laugh.  Considering that I'm falling in love with the country of Nicaragua (and the developing world in general), I wanted to share some of its idiosyncrasies that drove me nuts today.  Prepare yourself for a little Julie sass.

I needed import and export data for all products going in and out of Nicaragua.  Now, you are probably thinking (naively), as I did, that these would be managed by the same government organization.  This is not the case. 

Additionally, neither imports nor exports are available online (fully).  And the small sampling of data that is available online is in PDF, but let's not get me too riled up.  I am truly thankful for this valuable opportunity to practice my copy/paste skills- add that to my resume.

For the record, I would hardly consider USA Trade Online the golden standard, considering their website looks like I made it.  But I am at least proud to be an American considering the alternative...

Nicaraguan government websites look like advertisements for a kindergarten. 

Pink, really?  I mean, it's my favorite color, but even if I was the princess of this country, I wouldn't use pink webpages.  If I can't wear a tutu all the time, a government should not use pink, childish designs.

And just quickly notice the revolutionary language they use... Daniel Ortega may have overthrown a dictator, but he turned himself into an "avant-garde" version, with revolutionary propaganda masking his unending rule.

Ok, but let's get back to my story...

So I need export data.  Piece of cake.  Just email Ana Maria who gives me the email of the infamous but only semi-elusive webmaster at CETREX (website design TOTALLY beats USA Trade Online, by the way).  Send off an email, get a reply saying I can't have all that data, re-design data request in new email and.....  still waiting for the reply.  But I'd say that's serious progress compared to....

The NIGHTMARE that is import data.  They should write children's fairytales warning us all about DGA so that we can prepare for this at an early age.  Cause I just got blindsided after 25 years of assuming the world worked a certain way.  Think black hole meets maze meets bureaucracy and you'll have a pretty good perspective on the paradigm shift I underwent during the following steps...

Step 1) Go to DGA website. Search for data but only find PDF snippets (no surprise here).  Call numbers on the page.  First number doesn't work, try the next.  Try the next.  Eventually get through.  Ask in Spanish how to get the data.  You have to go to their office.  Ok.

2) Have the office manager, Raul, take you to the office.  He's busy, so Omar comes to the rescue.  Show up at MAGFOR offices (Wait, MAGFOR and DGA share offices?  Yes.  O, ok).  Ask for data.  Turns out you need to write a formal note requesting it (not an email, but a formal note, on company letter head)

3) Go back to office.  Write formal note.  Have colleague review formal note because you Spanish is anything BUT formal and you do NOT want to offend the beast that is DGA with a grammar mistake.  Figure out how to print formal note on company letter head.  Make Omar drive you back to DGA/MAFGOR.  Drop off note.

If you think you're done, just wait...

Receive a call that afternoon saying that the very same person you spoke to before (who is now calling you) gave you the wrong information.  You need to address the letter to Eddy instead.

4) Re-write and print letter.  Get Raul to drive you.  He forgets, so go later that afternoon.  Drive time takes longer than it seemed to before.  Turns out, there are multiple offices and you're now at a different one.  Hmmm.

5) Drop off letter (or try to). Eddy is actually at this office and not the MAGFOR/DGA one so lucky for you that Raul drove this time and not Omar.  Unfortunately, the lady there says you need a copy of your passport and a letter from an attorney to submit the request to the General Director of DGA.  O, and the data costs $5 per month and $10 per year, unless the General Director decides to waive the fee.  My Nica lunch costs $1.50.  This is pure robbery.

6) Debate whether this is all worth it and hand over the responsibility to your boss.  Focus on researching JUST coffee instead.

I think I am going to start a non-profit website dedicated to navigating the DGA.  O and it will have no pink and no revolutionary slogans.  Think I could get USAID to fund it?

Trip #2: Playa, volcan & isletas!

This past weekend I had the good fortune of tagging along with my gringo neighbor (and self-appointed older brother) and his friend Tomek from Poland.  And thankfully Tomek was crazy enough to travel over here with his almost-two-year-old daughter Ester.  O baby! 

Little Ester who never gets upset and talks in Polish, English and now a little Spanish.  The perfect little entertainer.










Day 1: beach.  Sorry, no pictures on my camera from this one.  Too busy soaking up the sun with friends.

Day 2: Volcan Mombacho & boat tour of the little island around Granada. 

View from Volcan Mombacho... look at the little isleta spots in the lake!

I'd been to Granada before with a friend, but unfortunately we were not adventurous enough to actually make it to the isletas. Lake Cocibola near Granada has 365 little islands formed by a volcanic eruption.  For about $100K you can buy your very own island (cost of constructing and maintaining a house not included).



More monos that somebody dropped on a little island.  Apparently one of the neighbors feeds them everyday.... or the tourist.  See them snacking on Ranchitas?



Sunset cruise of the isletas with take-out hawaiian pizza with fresh tropical pineapple.  Could there be a better ending to a wonderful day?  O yes there can... Josely and I got serenaded by Tomek and Joseph.  Spoiled, aren't we?  The crazy thing is, they rehearsed "Besame mucho" but not this one... so what you're about to hear is totally impromptu.

(video to come)

Apparently these boys only serenade in Spanish which significantly limits their knowledge of songs, so the last song was "Feliz Navidad." 

And the travel marathon begins...

Well, I have officially applied to business school, which means it's about time I see this beautiful country that I call home.  So I've put together quite the bucket list of Nica travel destinations and I have to said I've made quite the dent in the past 2 weekends....

First trip of 2011: Laguna de Apoyo.  According to my google search, the laguna was created 23,000 years ago after a volcanic erruption, which formed this 6-km-in-diameter crater.  The laguna is extremely deep and you can even go diving in it.  All along the waterfront are little resorts; we went to "La abuela."  Thankfully Emily convinced her boyfriend to drive us out there to spend a peaceful Sunday afternoon.  Thanks Ali!

Me, Kristen & Emily at Laguna de Apoyo (Ali is taking the pic)

Just beautiful!



That's right- mono!!



Trying to be less "chela."  Can't come back to the states without a tan!

A day in the life...

Not gonna lie, life isn't perfect.  I'm constantly surprised by how broken the world is, by how easily people hurt other people, by how many things just seem down-right unfair.  But the fact that it ticks me off just points to how lucky I am that I don't consider it normal.  That I have so many blessings.

So let's walk through a day in the life to show you...

Wake up around 7:15 or 7:30 or later, depending on how many times I hit the snooze button and what time the taxi is coming.  Roll out of my full sized bed, take a warm shower, throw on jeans or a casual skirt and top, dry my hair (hopefully it's a fresco day so I don't sweat too much), apply a minimal amount of make-up, grab a yogurt and my laptop and jump in the taxi.  Then it's a beautiful 15-min scenic ride to work with the wind in my hair.

Work varies by the day.  And so do my "extra" work activities: I often chat with some of you all, listen to music, watch a youtube video or two (or more, haha).  I love having this connection to you all back at home. 

The bean study is all wrapped up (with much success I might add), so I couldn't be more thrilled.  Now I'm onto another "project" which is still developing in objectives and approach.

In the states, I would use my free time to read various int'l development books.  Like "The End of Poverty" by Jeffery Sachs or "White Man's Burden" by William Easterly or "Freedom from Want" about BRAC or "Fortune at the Bottom of the Pyramid" by CK Prahalad.  (Confession: I have not read every word of all these books, because they were rather dry or I got busy).  It was frustrating cause I never had time to read.  And I was just rather unaware of all the organizations and programs out there.  While I'm still rather oblivious to a lot, I have to say that I feel like I'm getting a glimpse into the mysterious world of development, which is SO exciting.

Example?  Today I read an international development book AT WORK.  And it's a book that has yet to be published because my supervisor has connections.  And my next "project" will attempt to put this book into practice by looking at very specific opportunities with suppliers across industries to meet demand by addressing constraints.  How cool is that!?!?!  If only I could make a million bucks AND read int'l dev books all day.

Most days I order in Nica food for $1.50.  Today I splurged and ordered Subway, which is actually better here than in the States.  And every so often I make it out of the office for lunch with coworkers.

After work I went to the dance studio for my second-ever "Ritmos Latinos" class. Other extracurricular activites include biblestudy, a couple guitar lessons from my neighbor, TV, writing on my blog (obvio), chatting with friends and family, dinner with friends, "Young diplomats" happy hours, pilates at home, walks with my vecina, reading books, reading out loud in Spanish for practice, dancing around my apartment, singing at the top of my lungs, etc.  Its just so awesome to finish work and have time for myself. 

Then it's lights out around 10:30 or 11pm. Speaking of... night everyone!  Que suenes con los angeles.

My dream car

So those of you who know me well know that I really want a Smart Car (and nearly bought one in 2009).  Until today....

A cute tiny version of a Rav4 with 4 seats and 4-wheel drive.  What could be better?  Maybe a Daihatsu Copen? (google it) Less practical though. ;)

Mi paraiso

So I may or may not have mentioned that I moved over 2 months ago, but I figure it's about time to show you all my new digs.  Which are awesome by the way.  Want proof?


Main gate to paradise

My new home is awesome because it comes with built-in friends!  Joseph & Andres live in a two-bedroom apartment/house and Josely lives right next to me.  I couldn't ask for better neighbors.  Not to mention Amalia, who lives in the main house, and took one look at my unfurnished studio, said "you don't have anything?!?!" and furnished my place by the time I got back from work, complete with pots, pans, towels and a shower curtain.

 

Joseph & Andres' casa

Mi casita!





I would just like to comment that had I posted these photos before coming home for Christmas, you'd only be looking at a twin bed.  But I walked in the door after break to discover a full sized bed with brand new sheets.  Amalia thought I just needed a new one (plus they'll be renting out the apartment furnished when I leave in April).  But I benefit in the meantime.  And I should probably also mention the brand new TV they installed in mid-Dec. Yes!

Kitchen

... with a little bit of home!

Miss you all.  Un abrazo!